Experience Really Is the Best Teacher
Nothing says "genuine" like a story written by someone who knows his or her subject. And there's no better way to know a subject - really know it - than to live that life. Does this mean you need to be a special agent if you're going to write espionage thrillers? Not necessarily. But it does mean that it never hurts to go scuba diving once or twice before writing that scene where the International Girl of Mystery saves her Lover Boy from the school of Laser-Headed Piranhas.
Although I can't provide specific advice on how you should live in order to be a great writer, I do recommend living your life to the fullest. If you see something interesting, go out and try it. That said, certain life experiences can severely hinder your writing. Chronic drug and alcohol abuse, for example, as well as abusive relationships (try writing through "I don't feel like going home - I'm gonna order another drink" or "oh, you think you're gonna be a writer? How about you learn to frakin' cook"). There are many writers who have overcome difficult (and even terrible) experiences to become great writers (consider Elie Wiesel's Night
), and even individuals who have enjoyed morally questionable lives who go on to become bestsellers (such as Tucker Max
- many students boycotted him when he visited Hopkins as a guest speaker).
Regardless of the life you've lived or want to live, there's only one thing I'd like you to keep in mind - if you write, you are a writer. Even if it's just on the back of cocktail napkins while serving drinks at the bar, you're still a writer (and when I was a bartender, that's what I did to keep from loosing ideas). So write as much as you can, write about your own life and the lives of those who interest you. And ignore the warning below as much as possible...
Number One Sign You May Be Writing Too Much: Dissociation.
Do you ever feel "one" with your characters? Do you ever pull away from your stories wondering if this world is real or if the world you're writing about is real? Then you're beginning to dissociate from your reality and your mind is actually drifting into your fiction. Don't be alarmed - I believe that all good writing requires some element of this. However, it is something to keep an eye on. If you ever feel nervous about it, the best cure is simply to find a friend and to spend some time just talking about things. Generally, human beings crave the reassurance of others - it's one of the ways we center our perceptions of reality.
On the flip side, though, dissociation can sometimes help your writing. When you begin empathize with another point of view thoroughly enough to question your own, that means you have an incredible grasp of the motives and thoughts behind this persona. This isn't something to take lightly - many writers have difficulty progressing beyond their own voice. Reaching the point where you are writing "as a different person," so to speak, can provide an authenticity that wouldn't be possible if you were simply writing about that person.